“I will restore you . .and heal your wounds.” Jeremiah 3:17 NIV
“God has new life for you on the other side of your pain!”
My thoughts today are about “walls and bridges.”
How are you at building bridges? Bridges provide access across places, people, and things that separate. A lot of life is about bridge-building, spanning distances, eliminating differences, or overcoming difficulties that seem uncrossable. Bridges are a means to significantly connect with other people, and a way to reconcile differences to restore relationships.
Jesus was a bridge-builder. “You were separate from Christ . . without hope and without God in the world. But now in Christ Jesus, you who once were far away have been brought near through the blood of Jesus. For He Himself is our peace . .” Ephesians 2:12-14 NIV. Paul wrote, “God was reconciling the world to Himself in Christ . .” See 2 Corinthians 5:17-20 NIV.
But it’s easier and more tempting to build walls. We all do that much of the time. Walls provide shelter, safety, and security, but also separate people. There are walls you need, and walls that you don’t. When you build walls to keep others out, you may discover those same walls keep you secluded and alone. A lot of us are better at building walls than bridges, so some lives are lived in isolation and relationships remain difficult or short term. Usually a wall is built to protect you, because of something that happened before. That is usually an unsuccessful attempt to make sure something hurtful does not happen again. How has that worked for you?
Is there a place where you have built a wall, but really needed a bridge? “Unless the Lord builds the house, its builders labor in vain; unless the Lord watches over the city, the watchmen stand guard in vain.” Psalm 127:1 NIV. If your wall is an attempt to avoid pain, it will not work; you only trade one kind of pain you felt before for a different pain you feel now. The trade-off for never again letting people close enough to hurt you is a relational loneliness of soul that can even exclude God unintentionally.
Two things you know: hurting people hurt other people, and you cannot isolate yourself safely away from any possibility of ever being hurt. What’s the answer then? I suggest two things you can do. (1) Build a bridge to reconcile the relationship. “Repay no man evil for evil . . if it is possible, as much as depends on you, live peaceably with all men . . do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.” Romans 12:17-21 NKJV.
You cannot prevent people from being hurtful. You can choose to refrain from doing the same. “If your brother sins against you . .” Matthew 18:15 NIV. And what if the problem is of your creation? “If you remember that your brother has something against you . .” Matthew 5:23-24 NIV. Fairly or unfairly, the first responsibility for Godly initiative begins with the one who values the other most. No relationship is irreparable until both parties are willing for it to be.
(2) Use the bridge God provides to bring your pain to Him. Forgiveness is the bridge that brings you to a place of healing and restoration. Ideally, that is done mutually, but often it may have to be unilateral. Read Ephesians 4:30-32 NKJV. “Those who plunder you will be plundered . . but I will restore you to health and heal your wounds . .“ Read Jeremiah 30:16-22.
Here’s what God did for Job when the counsel and conduct of his friends added to his already extensive pain, “And the Lord restored Job’s losses when he prayed for his friends. Indeed the Lord gave Job twice as much as he had before.” Job 42:10 NKJV. Prayer may or may not change the other person, but I guarantee you prayer will change you. God has new life for you on the other side of your pain!
My prayer for you today is that you tear down walls and build bridges instead.